Surrounded by bright souls
I felt mine darkening
It used to be like that before-
Bright as the sun, blinding
Bounded to a darkness after the fall
Neither the sun nor the stars were more tempting
Than the warmth of a hellhole
That was as dark as a buried coffin
It’s been so long since I felt this whole
I am a shadow in the brightest light, dominating
Had enough with the light that stole
The black, an ink that’ll keep me breathing
Even after my ending…
The thing about romance and love… Well, let’s just say it’s some weird shit. Would you think that one day, you might actually fall in love with a voice?
I heard your voice for two weeks, and you drew me in with just that. I was too shy to turn and face you, to discover the face with the mouth that uttered a splendor.
You weren’t serenading or speaking poetically, it was simply your voice. My body and my brain interpreted it as one of my favorite songs.
It seeped under my skin and found its way to a locked chest in which I’ve buried my emotions…
Days and days later…. coincidence revealed your face. It’s not that you have extraordinary beauty, but to me, the beauty I saw was enough.
Maybe it’s because I’m a hopeless romantic that I fall for someone so easily, or maybe it’s because of you.
I just wish that the eyes I caught staring weren’t a work of my imagination.
I wish that the reason you always sit behind me is because you want to be as close as possible or you want me to know that you exist.
I know I’m going to regret these words afterwards.
I guess part of me enjoys being fragile and exposed.
I really need to be loved. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced true love or any sort of love. That’s why I get attached so easily. To me, it’s a chance at love. The warm fuzzy feelings you get in your stomach. The smile that draws itself on your face simply by a thought. The safety you feel by merely a gaze.
I’m a hopeless romantic. I think in a poetic way. I imagine things that I know would never happen.
I’m fragile and exposed.
But at least-
There’s something about the night. You lie awake and start a long chain of thoughts. You start pondering on your life. Where did you go wrong? Why are you here? When will these tears stop escaping you so easily?
There’s something about the night. It’s 2 AM and you’re still awake. You wait for the answers that you can’t sleep without. Your eyes are begging for rest while your mind keeps swirling with the never-ending questions. What about love? What’s the point of all this hurt? Why can’t it be without scars? When will you be loved? Why do you love him but he doesn’t love you back? “That’s not fair,” you yell inwardly, but then, what is?
There’s something about that darkness. It darkens your vision forcing you to search for an inner light. And the silence. Oh, that silence is worth a thousand years of peace. It’s the few moments that world is at peace and still. The earth has stopped moving and everyone’s asleep, while others like me, beg for rest, hoping these thoughts and these words would stop circulating in my head. I’m begging them to stop, but they’re just getting started. They’ve been waiting for this freedom for so long. They won’t listen to your pleas nor will they have mercy. You’ll stay awake until they get tired and return to their slumber. You’ll close your eyes and find that peace at last, and the darkness will take over. And silence…
I can’t describe the joy I feel when you’re this close. When we’re breathing the same air. When you talk to me, when I hear your voice… and my name on your lips. It’s beautiful. I feel beautiful when you look at me. When your eyes decide to carve a memory of me…
That day, when you asked what my name was, I couldn’t stop smiling. I swear I couldn’t.
I keep envisioning those eyes of yours… I try to let their warmth seep from my memory into my body, into my veins… until it’s embracing my heart.
I keep retracing lips that were never kissed, wondering how yours would feel against mine.
I keep running my hands across my arms, wondering how firm your grip is, wondering how easily you can lift me… wondering how safe I would feel….
This isn’t about a heart skipping a couple of beats, nor it is about the flutters I always get when I think about you…
More than the typical romance novel shit…
This isn’t a typical attraction.
I’m afraid this might be an addiction.
Addiction to your warmth, your strength, your lovely scent, and your sweet voice.
You make me beautiful.
Your proximity, my addiction, makes me beautiful.